by Amanda Smith    

I feel that the Lord has been preparing to do a great work in me. The only problem is that I won’t completely surrender. Why is it so hard for me to give my imperfect life up to a worthy and perfect God? I don’t know. I feel like I spend more time worrying about petty subjects than actually putting that energy and emotion into my Savior. I have to admit that most of my motives have been selfish and self-seeking yet God is still loving me unconditionally without holding back. I am desperate for a pure relationship with Him where my intentions are to bring Him glory and not myself. I know my relationship with the Lord and His people will grow from here on out. Even the mountains bow to the Lord; so will I! I want to lead a pure and noble lifestyle.

I have struggled with doing so for a very long time. Impatience, lust and bitterness have unfortunately had a hold on me for too long. The past has been dim at times, but my future is bright if I give it all to Him. I just have to give up all control for this to happen. I am a control freak, so this is extremely difficult for me to do. To be the bride of Christ is more rewarding, honoring and more amazing than anything this world has to offer. The Lord gave me voice, so let the words I speak be uplifting to Him. The Lord gave me a heart, so let every beat be for Him. I am not perfect, but my God is. I pray that my intentions are true and that God will continue to reveal Himself through the good and bad of my life. God has not changed, but I have. Thankfully, through it all He has never turned His back on me and I know He never will. He will never stand me up. He will never have to pencil me in. He will never break up with me. He will never let me down. I am so thankful that I serve such a wonderful God!

email: amanda_l_smith@cornerstone.edu