by Lisa Heasley

I’m engaged. And it stinks.

Don’t get me wrong. There was a time when being engaged was amazing.

Once upon a time, I went camping with my boyfriend and his family in Ludington. We spent a nice family day at the beach, and when evening came, Colin Hunter(that’s his name) took me out on a romantic date.

We went to Ludington’s cute downtown and ate dinner in a cute restaurant.

Then we got ice cream at a cute little ice cream shop.

Then we went to the beach again where Colin proceeded to serenade me with his guitar as we watched the sunset.

After that, Colin said he had something for me. He went to the car and brought back a photo album that he put together, with cute pictures of our adventures together. The photo album ended with a love letter, and when I looked up…

A ring! Colin switched from boyfriend to fiancé. It was magical.

Fast forward a year and a month. Not so magical.

When Colin proposed to me a year ago and I accepted, the original plan was not to have a long engagement. We were thinking the next summer.

But alas, my brother decided to get engaged first, and get married in June. We didn’t want to steal his thunder, and I didn’t want my parents to crack under the pressure of getting two kids’ weddings together.

So we decided: December 18, 2009. What’s six more months anyway? Everyone says that time goes super fast when you’re engaged because it takes soooooo much time and planning to get everything perfect.

Wrong.

I know that I have no one to blame but myself for this long engagement, and I take full responsibility for it. But, I won’t say it doesn’t stink.

Being engaged was fun for the first few months. I got to look at the sparkly thing on my finger and think about all the things I wanted for my wedding.

But, I couldn’t really plan anything yet, because it was too soon. It’s not really necessary to book a caterer a year in advance. Or flowers. And, when I went to look at dresses, and I told the consultant the date was December of the next year, I could tell she was judging me.

The worst part? We just want to be married. Yeah, now that we’re actually close to the big day, planning is getting more fun. But it’s been a year.

I asked Colin his thoughts and he said, “The excitement sort of wore off. We couldn’t plan when we wanted to and now that we can, it’s not as exciting. I just want to be married now and I’m tired of waiting.”

According to TheKnot.com (the ultimate wedding planning Web site, if you ask me), the average engagement in America is 12-18 months. I think that’s crazy.

Women, haven’t you been thinking about your wedding since you were a little girl? Don’t you basically know already exactly what you want your wedding to look like?

I know I did. I had everything planned out in my head before I was even engaged. It shouldn’t take 18 months to get it all together.

There is a lesson to be learned from here. We all know Cornerstone’s reputation of engagements, and there’s nothing wrong with that. I don’t want to crush your dreams of the perfect engagement.

But, consider yourself warned. Men: don’t pop the question unless you know the timing is going to be right.

Because being engaged for a year- It stinks.