by Amanda Ciofu

This summer I was a part of the GO Sichuan team that went to China to teach English to victims of the 2008 Sichuan earthquake. When I first arrived I fell in love with everything and everyone around me. I had always wanted to go to China, and I couldn’t wait to start getting to know the people there. My team and I’s teaching experience got off to an interesting start, when after spending days training on how to teach teenagers we were asked to teach kindergarteners and very low level English speaking children. After that first day with my kindergarteners I returned to my room feeling useless and confused. I asked God why I was there. Why he would bring me to China when I wasn’t doing any good. I felt so alone and I was pained that I wanted to leave the country I fell so in love with. As days went on God began to show me the joy He was bringing into the community we were teaching. Each day as I watched the children’s faces light up as we arrived, I could see the light that God was shining. I felt so thankful that our plans had changed.

                For our last two weeks we were moved to a different city to teach teenagers. After the previous week I felt ready and excited to meet older kids and really form bonds with students, yet somehow after my first day I left with a heavy heart. I felt like a failure. I didn’t feel like a good teacher, I didn’t feel like my students connected with me,  and I didn’t feel like I was ever going to do any good. As I sat and listened to each of my teammates talk about how much they loved their students, again I felt useless. The first few days were rough but God placed me with an amazing team that loved me. Even when I felt like a failure they reminded me that I wasn’t and that I was here for a reason. They gave me hope and reminded me to trust what God was doing. By the end of the first week everything had changed. I didn’t feel cut out to be a teacher, yet God was so faithful. He gave me the words to speak and the courage to do so. He showed me how to connect with the students even though there was a language barrier. He opened my eyes to a new kind of love and helped me form solid relationships with students.

Each person that I met in China has impacted me forever. The love that the students have for each other and the love they had for my team and I was inspiring. They were so concerned with helping us, though they barely knew us, and were willing to do whatever it took to make us happy. I want to love like that. I want to take that love from China and apply it to my life in America. I can see how God used my team and I to touch lives and shine His light into China, but I can also see how much God used His people there to touch my life and the lives of each one of my teammates. I never thought I would be able to do some of the things God brought me to, but He knew I could. And after this I feel ready for anything and excited for whatever He has next for me.  

email: amanda_j_ciofu@cornerstone.edu