Student Testimony: Libby Burton
“Surrender is not an exploit- something we do- as much as a renovation-something that is done in us. True surrender is not a single action but a posture in life, yielding ourselves- our whole selves-to God.”
—Margaret Fein berg Sacred Echos
This quote struck me this summer as I read it in the book “Sacred Echos.” More times than not, I tend to become prideful in my sacrifice to God. Whether I am trying to let Him control finances, relationships, school or the future, part of me wants to hold onto it all.
For me, I think that surrendering is taking a step of faith into an ultimate soul transformation. It’s like a rearrangement of your heart; a redesign of your being. I imagine surrender is like rearranging your furniture. You take the rooms in your heart and give it a makeover. No longer are you the landlord, but you are actually letting God be the Lord of your heart. It’s an epic lifestyle to live, a dangerous habit to grab hold of that will radically change your everyday walk.
So often I think that when I surrender, I must be willing to get down on my knees and say, “Lord, take hold of my life, my calling, my future. Be my everything. I give you my life.” However, in the back of my mind I am really saying, “Lord, take hold of this small area of my life; you can have today, but not tomorrow. I’m not actually giving up control, just what I think sounds good.”
Really, why would I want to have control over my life? I mean, when it comes down to the Creator of the Universe running it or my own hands, I would much rather have someone who can conger up the entire planet rather than someone who can hardly solve a simple math problem (aka me).
Recently, I have really been hit with what God wants me to do with my future. The plans seem few and far between, and for someone who likes personal organizers and schedules, to not know what lies ahead is mildly horrifying. Through this process I am reminded time and time again to surrender my plans to God. I am continually faced with the reality of developing surrender as a way of life rather than a momentary offering.